2010 Life Planning

I’ve been thinking lately about a quote I read last year from the late Dr. Randy Pausch’s book, The Last Lecture: “experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.” Dr. Pausch, a popular young Carnegie Mellon University professor, died last year of pancreatic cancer. In his book, Pausch shares his childhood dreams and how he achieved most of them. His book inspires people to go after their dreams, in spite of life’s setbacks and heartbreaks. In his lecture, shared on Oprah and recorded on YouTube, Pausch also outlined some other secrets of his success:
o Brick walls are there for a reason: they let us prove how badly we want things
o Have a sense of fun and wonder
o We need to value people over things
o Decide early on if you’re a Tigger or an Eeyore
o Work and play well with others
o Show gratitude
o Don’t complain; just work harder
I encourage you to watch the video of his talk from The Last Lecture web site: http://www.thelastlecture.com/ Pausch shares some powerful reminders of several important things we should remember every day if we want to live well. And now, here are some more personal musings…

Recently, I found out that I would be retiring from the US Air Force instead of transferring to a new position. This is not what I wanted, but it is the experience I am getting. I had planned on transferring to the Air Force Reserves and continuing my military ministry. Well, that’s not going to happen! So, now what do I do? Well, I am seeking wisdom from God through prayer, Bible study and the astute counsel from friends I admire and respect, among them, my wife and best friend. Suddenly I have time and flexibility I’ve not known for over 25 years. Since 9-11-2001, I have averaged about 80 days a year serving God and country as an Air Force Chaplain. Now, how will I best serve God and others? I am not exactly sure. However, I must tell you that I am not busy making plans to fill the void in my life, mostly because I don’t feel a void. Also, I am well aware of the saying, often attributed to both Woody Allen and Van Zant: “If you want to hear God laugh, just tell him your plans.” So, I am waiting, and seeking…

Meanwhile, I am also reminded of some other great truths from Scripture. Psalm 2:1-4 reminds me not to leave God out of the planning:
1 Why do the nations conspire
and the peoples plot in vain?
2 The kings of the earth take their stand
and the rulers gather together
against the LORD
and against his Anointed One.
3 "Let us break their chains," they say,
"and throw off their fetters."
4 The One enthroned in heaven laughs;
the Lord scoffs at them.
James 4:13-15 also reminds me to keep seeking God:
13Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." 14Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.

So, as 2010 unfolds, so will God’s plan for my life. I “think” Cindy and I will be leading a mission trip to Uganda in March. We “believe” we will also teach a class in Italy in May, and “most likely” we will lead a church probe for Aletheia in June. I am also “hoping” to attend the Oxford Round Table conference in July and make a presentation there on “The Psychology of Religion and the Religion of Psychology.” If we get to Oxford, we also “hope” to visit the home of C.S. Lewis, and my ancestral homelands, Wales and Scotland. Perhaps, finally, I “will complete” a book I started several years ago, Before I Sleep: Reflections on the Meaning of Life and Death. Who knows? In reality, only God does at this point. In 2010, I will seek to follow Him an all ways, big and small.

What about you? What are “your” plans for 2010?

What Win I?

“What win I, if I gain the thing I seek? A dream, a breath, a froth of fleeting joy. Who buys a minute's mirth to wail a week? Or sells eternity to get a toy? For one sweet grape who will the vine destroy?” William Shakespeare, The Rape of Lucrece

Many years ago, I had the opportunity to see the old Wade Hampton Hotel imploded to make way for a new AT&T high-rise office complex in Columbia, SC. I was amazed that it only took a matter of seconds to bring down the old hotel that just a few moments before stood proudly across the street from the capital building on the corner of Main and Gervais. A few carefully placed explosives and down she came into a pile of rubble and a cloud of dust. All of this transpired just to make room for another building that it then took over two years to complete. It was a stark reminder to me that life truly is a precious, fragile gift that needs to be treasured, guarded and protected at all times. The good we have and the good we know can crumble so quickly! Anytime we lose anything that appears to be sturdy and strong, it will take a long time to rebuild anything substantial in its place.

The Shakespeare quote I started with has been on my mind a lot since the Tiger Woods scandal broke a few weeks ago. Like many of you, I am shocked and saddened by all the reports of infidelity by Mr. Woods. His once squeaky-clean image has tarnished so quickly. He seemed to have it all - a beautiful wife, two healthy young children, a successful career, more money than anyone could possibly imagine, and fans all over the world who admired him, just to name a few of his accolades and attributes. Oh, how the mighty hath fallen! Why? With all this and so much more, why would he throw it all away? It appears he may be heading to divorce court soon, and he has already lost not only his sponsorships with Accenture, Buick, and TAG Heuer, but also his luster as a man of integrity. “A minute’s mirth to wail a week… for one sweet grape who will the vine destroy?” We live in a culture and a time that so easily succumbs to instant gratification without much thought for long-term gain or loss. Perhaps in the moment something may appear to feel just right, yet if we’d only take a deep breath and a moment to reflect on the long-term results, we might choose very differently. Yet, given the nature of human nature, it is a wonder things like this don’t happen more often to people we know, or to us. How many among us will seek, in the coming days or in the coming year, but “a dream, a breath, a froth of fleeting joy,” or will you even consider that something you may want so much may just “sell eternity to get a toy?”

Esau sold his birthright to his brother Jacob for a bowl of stew (Genesis 25: 29-34). David saw Bathsheba’s beauty and could think of nothing else besides wanting her, which including forgetting his duty to his family and nation (2 Samuel 11). Judas betrayed Jesus for a bag of money (Mark 14:10-11). Peter denied Jesus for fear of being identified with him, and perhaps arrested, tortured and killed along with him as well (Mark 14: 66-72). Paul, also called Saul, assisted the angry crowd as they stoned Stephen to death by watching their coats while the dirty deed was done (Acts 7:54-8:1). And then there was Tiger, and you, and me… when did we last succumb to something that seemed so sweet in the moment only to eventually lose face or place or space? “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall (1 Corinthians 10:12).” Tiger doesn’t need our pity or our prideful sense that we are living so much better than he. He needs our prayers, and the only thing that truly saves any of us in the end: “amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me; I once was lost, but now I’m found; was blind but now I see” (Amazing Grace by John Newton, 1725-1807, slave trader, Christian convert, and pastor).

Watch What You're Thinking!

Proverbs 3:27 states, "as a man thinks in his heart, so is he." 19th century Danish philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard, seemed to share the same sentiment when he penned, “our life always expresses the result of our dominant thoughts.” More up-to-date, but still to-the-point is Earl Nightingale, who wrote: “you become what you think about most.” So, the take away for me is watch what you‘re thinking!
Several years ago, I read the following on the Air Force Academy web site:
“Watch your thoughts,
They become your words;
Watch your words,
They become your actions;
Watch your actions,
They become your habits;
Watch your habits,
They become your character;
Watch your character,
It becomes your destiny.” (Author Unknown)
Similar theme, right? Right! It must be important! Then, I remembered this from the Apostle Paul: “finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8 NIV)
Okay, I think I’ll need to let this soak in for awhile. Then, I’ll need to act accordingly. What about you and your dominant thoughts? Where are they taking you?

An Attitude of Gratitude

Who have you to thank for your life as you now know it? A spouse? A friend? A parent? A teacher? A coach? A mentor? God? When have you last told them, "thank you for all you've meant to me"? Albert Schweitzer was right when he wrote: "At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." So, who will you connect with this week to say, "thanks"? I'd like to challenge you to call, email, post, text or write a heartfelt thanks to someone each day this week. Yes, it is Thanksgiving week, so maybe all of this sounds very cliche, but we often do much less than the best we know. So, do it. Live with an attitude of gratitude this week, and maybe you'll get so good at it, it will become a lifelong habit. Master Eckhart seem to understand the importance of this when he stated: "If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice." Happy Thanks-Giving, Everyone!

Times of Pain and Suffering

I often tell my students that the greatest lessons I’ve learned in life occurred during my darkest times of pain and suffering. C.S. Lewis wrote in his book, The Problem of Pain: “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pain; it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”
Author Elmer Towns visited Mount Rushmore National Monument in South Dakota for the first time at night, only to discover that, because of a thunderstorm in the area, all the light that usually illuminated the faces of Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Roosevelt had vanished, making it impossible to see their faces clearly. “The spectacular carvings were veiled in darkness," he wrote. “But what I thought was a barrier became a blessing. Flashes of lightning accompanied the thunderstorm, and with each flash I got a quick glance at the great sculptures. The more I watched, the more I realized that I was appreciating their magnificence and grandeur even more than I would have if the storm had not forced me to view them more intensely.”
In the same way, we often struggle to understand life, God, even ourselves - especially during the dark and stormy times. Usually we know God is there, but sometimes we cannot see Him clearly. Then comes some flash of light: an incredible moment when we appreciate the beauty of creation - perhaps a spectacular sunset, or a renewed admiration for autumn’s color; maybe it is a prick of our conscience when we fail to do something we know we should do; or it could be a reminder of some Scripture like Psalm 23, “I will fear no evil, for You are with me.”
Many Scriptures remind us “if God is with us, who can be against us,” and Jesus himself promised, “I am with you always.” So, look for Him, no matter what you’re going through during this season of your life. If you look carefully, I know you will see flashes of His majesty and grace.

In the Meantime

A former professor of mine at Duke, the late Dr. Carlyle Marney, once said this powerful statement in class: “most of life is lived in the meantime, and unless one learns to live life in the meantime, one is less than half alive!” What did Marney mean by that? Well, I think he meant to remind us that even though much of life is lived doing things like standing in line at Wal Mart, or sitting at traffic signals, or waiting for your number to be called at the DMV, life is still going on even then. Sometimes we are tempted to think that life is only really lived on the weekends. But if we wait to live only then, we’re missing five-sevenths of our time here on earth! Occasionally, I hear people saying things like, “I can’t wait for my next vacation!” I understand the feeling, but if you wait for vacations to be fully alive, that only gives you 2 or 3 out of 52 weeks a year to live!
What’s my point? Live every day! Live every moment of every day! Don’t wait for your graduation to live; don’t wait to land your ideal job; don’t wait until you’re married or until the kids are all grown, or until you retire. Live life every second, even the “in the meantime” moments! The Psalmist once wrote “teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” (Psalm 90:12) I’ve calculated that even if I live to be 90 years old, I will have only 32,850 days here on earth, plus a few extra ones added in for the leap years. That doesn’t seem very long, and now I am realizing that every day is a precious gift. Again the Psalmist wrote, “this is the day the Lord has made; let us be glad and rejoice in it!” (Psalm 118:24) Live your life, even “in the meantime!”

Why MeaningQuest?

"A strong sense of meaning is what motivates us to get out of bed each morning and confront another day and all its uncertainty... it makes life more of an adventure."
(The Search for Meaning, 1994, Naylor, Willimon & Naylor)

If Dr. Viktor Frankl is right, and I think he is, the search for meaning is the deepest longing of every human being. Dr. Frankl suggested three avenues for discovering meaning: (1) something to do; (2) someone to love; and (3) suffering with courage and dignity. You might need to know that he was a survivor of several Nazi concentration camps during World War II, arrested and imprisoned simply because he was a Jew. He lost his wife, his parents, a brother, and many friends in the death camps. He came close to death many times himself. His book, Man's Search for Meaning, remains one of the best selling books of all time, and has been translated into over 30 languages. It is one of my all-time favorites as well. I've read it 2-3 times every year since 1978, just to help me keep my perspective on life. I encourage you to read it. My plan here is to start posting some blogs about these three avenues to meaning. As a Christian, Jesus speaks to me in each of these areas, and gives me the deepest meaning of all: abundant and eternal life (John 3:16; John 10:10)! Please share how you have found meaning in your life; and, as I share how I've found meaning in mine, we'll join in the quest together!